She left the suds in the bucket and the clothes hanging out on the line.....

Ya'll.  When I met my husband THAT NIGHT I told him "I can cook anything but I'm a terrible housewife."

Almost ten years later and I'm still in that dinghy of a boat, singing my little own tune which might or might not be a Spice Girls song.

My point is, I might MIGHT have finally mastered this laundry game.  Don't hold your breath though.  I haven't shrunk anything or dyed a whole mess of whites Peep Pink in over a year...

First off, know when it comes to this jazz I'm CHEAP.  I don't buy bougie fancy crap.  I buy what we need and use all.  of.  it.  So if I'm taking the time to write about it, it's worth your dollar dollar bills, ya'll.  (Anyone remember that song?  Anyone?  No, just me?  Okurrr...)

I have found over the years it doesn't matter if you buy expensive Tide or Members Mark (Sams) laundry soap, as long as you buy the liquid kind, ya stuff will be clean.  (Tide Pods never dissolved completely and I used them up so fast).  Same for fabric softener.  Any smell will do, from the creepy Bear brand to whatever Sams or Costco has on sale at the time.  Oh an dryer sheets!  I buy cheapo Aldi brand and they work great!  (I also run those bad boys through my daughter's hair when the frizz sets in.  That ish is magic!)

I throw in vinegar whenever I do towels or underwear/socks.  I never measure.  I just dump.  Like maybe a cup?  Maybe 2?  I don't know.  It's Russian roulette but stuff comes out fresh and never sour!

Shout Color Catcher's are a godsend for when I am washing a load of Husby's work stuff because I forget he has white undershirts in there and these guys keep them from looking frumpy.

Shout is a main staple in my house basically for anything hahaha!  I use it as carpet cleaner and spot treatment on decorative stuff like pillows also.  If something is really gross I'll dump a cup (or 2?) in a big ol bowl with water and let the yucky stuff soak over night.  Or two nights.  #YOLO

Oxi Clean White Revive is something I would recommend for anyone who is scared of bleach.  I use bleach in almost all of my white loads but some of the kids' white clothes have designs/logos that will get messed up from bleach.  These little doodads work super well!  On big loads I do have to use two but I bought this first pack over a month ago in my monthly Subscribe and Save order from Amazon (another blog post another time, I promise), and I still haven't used the entire package. 

I hope this inspires/helps/bores? some of you out there in the world. wide. webs.  It's POURING rain here in Tulsa and my big ol scary dogs are hiding in my closet til it subsides.  Life is RUFF.  HA! 

What have you dyed pink lately?
XOXO Summer

2019 in a teeny tiny peanut shell

Can you believe it's been over a year since I've blogged last?  Anyone still out there?  (ECHOOOOOOOOO-OOOOO-OOOO)

The past year has been a whirlwind of....well...madness.  I finally packed up my 'teaching trunk' for good and I'm a better person for it.  It was hard to say goodbye but the future is BRIGHT, ya'll.  Let me tell you!

I'm still a Realtor for an ah-mazing real estate company local to Tulsa.  Real estate is like a roller coaster.  You love it and there's parts that make you go WHEEEE! and parts that make you turn green.  Mostly WHEEEE's though...  It also keeps me out of driving a minivan because let's be honest, I'm not about that life. 

If you had told me I'd find an amazing job which I LOVED in payroll and HR that I'm decently good at I'd laugh at you.  So I guess I'm laughing.  One of my dearest friends from high school (how was that SIXTEEN years ago?!  OY!) got me talking to the right people and now I'm surrounded by happiness, laughs, payroll and a job where I can snuggle Elmo -- yes he's still alive by the literal Grace of God-- every. day.  I'm telling ya'll, life is GOOD.

Elmo is still around.  He turns 18 in February.  He is on thyroid medicine and has a nasty, gross tumor under his chin but he's still eating and going potty outside so he's still kickin.  The newest change for him is that he loves his pet taxi we bought him.  It's like his play fort.  Turns out we shoulda bought him one years ago.  Who knew?  Every night after he eats he jumps up over Ruger's crate and climbs 'in bed'.  Bless him.

Our Bass Babes are doing well.  They are both in 2nd grade and in the same. class.  (Yup, I'm THAT mom this year but don't worry, their teacher is pretty much amazing and perfect and patient and has a sense of humor so we're blessed).  Bee has struggled this year more than I've liked and it's a hard pill to swallow.  Sometimes a mama has to watch her baby bird fail a few times for them to learn and oh my lanta it's GUT WRENCHING.  Turtle is adjusting well but this poor boy needs to branch out socially!  He is so shy just like his daddy!

I'm still cooking and eating and doing all the things in the kitchen.  One struggle I have experienced this year is having my right thyroid removed and dealing with (minor) weight gain since my VSG in 2017.  I'm blessed to be able to not have to take any thyroid medication and I am still looking good but I know I can't eat graham crackers and icing as a snack anymore- HA!

I have lots of new ideas and themes and things to write about!  I can't wait to share it with yall!  PLEASE PLEASE let me know if you want me to share anything?

Husby made dinner and I'm taking COMPLETE advantage of the fact.  He's been on a roll lately.

Bee is screaming in the hallway because her younger brother DROPPED her in the hallway from a botched piggy back ride.  Can I hide in the bathroom?!





peace.  love.  i hate daylight savings.
-Summer

Lather, Rinse, Pray, Repeat.

It's two days til my surgery and unbeknownst to me, a shadow has been looming over me.  Today it made its' grand appearance.  In my shower. 

I kept telling myself in these past few days that "I've had surgery before and everything has been fine.  Doctors are smarter than me and they know what they're doing.  I didn't freak out like this when I had my gall bladder taken out (come to find out there's waaaaaaaay more to that surgery than my vsg!) so why freak out now?!"  All that positive self talk jazz.

Tonight I kissed my children goodnight for the last time for (at least ) 4 days and went to my hot, waiting shower.  And I fell apart.  I cried and I cried and I cried and I sobbed and I prayed and I prayed and I prayed. 

Then my entire life in this house all made sense.  It was less than 6 years ago I found God again and he made my world right side up.  And in this shower I have prayed my hardest I have ever prayed for anything-- just me, God and hot water washing away tears.  Tears for....  Lost jobs.  Lost babies.  Lost (almost) marriages.  Finding God.  Answered prayers.  Losing Caddy.  Unexpected blessings.  Happy surprises.  Saved marriages.  Pitiful medical diagnosis.  Promising solutions...This shower is my prayer room.  In this steamy, wet rectangle of tile I have poured my heart and soul out into prayer over and over until my lips knew every syllable of every word of what I begged God for.  And he answered every. single. one.  Sometimes not exactly as I had planned but such is life.  This is God's road map.  We are just the exit signs.  Sometimes there's detours. 

In this shower tonight I was so so so scared that something would happen to me during my surgery and recovery.  Turtle clung to me for dear life when I kissed him and sang him his bedtime song.  Bee asked me if I didn't come back who would take her to school in August or sing her 'angels'.  OH.  MY.  GOSH.  That is heavy stuff.  And in that shower I prayed NOT that God would get me through this week, but that he would take care of the hearts of my sweet, innocent children should something go south.  

A wave of emotion washed over me again and I about drowned on tears and water drops, realizing 6 short years ago my grandmother left us to be with Jesus and I was NOT prepared for it.  I was filled with warmth and I knew she was with me.  Was she telling me I was going to be ok?  Are the kids going to be ok?  "WHAT IS GOING TO BE OK?" I cried through the soap and shampoo.  Grandmother always told me Doughty women are strong.  She's right.  That's all the confirmation I needed that everything is going to work out. God will provide for us the best way he knows how to and no matter what storm comes HE will get us through.  She loved and lost so much in her life and yet she died with a smile on her face.  I can only pray the Good Lord grants me that same grace.

I sat there in the shower repeating prayer after prayer, God slowly lifting the nasty fog free from my face and allowing me to see rationally.  As I toweled off I felt 400% better knowing God had heard me.  Thank God for that shower!

As I was getting dressed I could only imagine what 'Come to Jesus' meeting I'll have next in my prayer room but I know no matter what the Father Above has my back!  

Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not me dismayed, for I am your God. 
I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you wiht my righteous right hand.

Where is your prayer room?
XOXO Summer

Long sleeves and skinned knees

If y'all know me personally you would know my struggle with my weight has been in existence since I was. Oh. Eight. And I'm 5'0. Being fun sized has its' perks. And its' pits. Right now I'm dealing with the latter.

The highlight of my year was LOSING 65% of my hair and being diagnosed with PCOS. (Google it. I'm not explaining that hot mess ....). That was when I had had enough. Enough weight watchers points. Enough cussing at my scale like it's the scales' fault I've ballooned. Tired of being embarrassed to be seen in public next to a healthy, fit husband.  I've dusted the proverbial sh*t off my pants and have chosen to rise above feeling sorry for myself.  Skinned knees and hurt fat feelings no more!

Enter 'vertical SLEEVE gastrectomy'.  It sounds weird.  But it's genius.  I have had the blessing of supportive family, friends, and health care professionals.  I have found an ah-mazing doctor in Dallas who will do the surgery.  Next Thursday, I will be put under general anesthesia and 75% of my stomach will be laparoscopic-ally removed and I will be free of my 'fat girl inhibitions'.  NO, this is not my easy way out.  I will still have to maintain a high protein, low carb life style with enough water to sink the Titanic but I will be healthier, thinner, and happier.  (I will also have to be 500% more active but the new treadmill I got for an early birthday present from the Parentals will help me get my life in gear!)

I'm excited to see what the future holds for me and my little family.  I will continue to LOVE my job being a Tulsa Realtor. I'll just be a little (or a LOT) lighter!

Please pray for me, this is the first time I will ever have elective surgery and it's a bit unnerving.  Also, please pray for the dear Hubs.  I've only been able to have protein shakes, water, and a small piece of chicken everyday for the past week and will continue that way until my surgery next Thursday.  I've been less than pleasant!

Sorry for what I said when I was hungry,
XOXO Summer

 2009 After another fun round of WW!

I was at my 'goal weight' and running 3 miles a day!  125 pounds!

 Christmas 2016

 Spring 2017

 Fall 2016

I'm ready for a new me!

Wordless Wednesday

  

Nothing says Happy Birthday like personalized soap, y'all. 

Scrub a dub dub. 

XOXO Summer

Zink Park

There's a park in the heart of Tulsa's Brookside area that not a lot of people are familiar with. Bestie Dragon and I play tennis there a lot but I never knew it's secrets until Bestie Red took us beyond the tree line. 

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you...... ZINK PARK!

Beyond the tacky jungle gym and courts lies this secret garden oasis. 

 

 

 

That's crystal clear water y'all!

 http://www.tulsalibrary.org/tos/zink-park

What have you explored today? 

XOXO Summer

 

Spaghetti-OH!

I'm all about simple. And cheap. And delicious. I've finally perfected the 15 minute spaghetti. 

 

*We mostly shop at Aldi for our groceries. Our entire meal cost us $7.50 to make. For everyone! 

Here's what you need: 

-A package of ground turkey or beef. 

- Envelope of Italian dressing seasoning 

- Pasta (we LOVE this brown rice pasta! It's denser than regular pasta but has much better flavor and isn't slimy like regular cooked pasta)

-Jar of marinara sauce 

-2 Bouillon cubes (if you want, I toss them into boiling water for pasta. I literally use whatever flavor I have on hand. 

 

1.  Boil water and cubes. Add pasta when water is boiling. It only takes 9 minutes. Also add olive oil as needed and stir. Pasta will stick of you don't. I always chew on a piece to know if it's done because appearance doesn't really change. 

2.  Brown meat with Italian seasoning. When it's browned add marinara and let simmer while pasta is cooking. 

3.  Toss strained pasta in olive oil. (It will stick. Seriously.)

4.  You're done. You're welcome. 

Peace. Love. Pasta. 

XOXO Summer 

All Aboard Ollie's Station!

Here in the South we pride ourselves in local, family owned restaurants. The chicken fried steaks are bigger and the sweet teas are sweeter. It's just a fact of life. 

If y'all ever make it to Tulsa, Oklahoma, boot scoot on over to the West side and visit Ollie's. 

 

 

 

We had the breakfast buffet but they also have a full service lunch menu also. Adults can reasonably eat for under $10 and kids under $6. 

We're members of the 'clean plate, seconds please' club. 

 

 

If the atmosphere alone doesn't send you to your happy place, these pies sure as heck will. 

 

Thank you, Ollies, for making my week!  It was delicious!

Check out their website here: http://www.olliesstation.com/

#eatallthefoods

XOXO Summer 

Friday Five

Y'all! It's been soooo long! This is a 'beauty edition' so if makeup isn't your thing I won't shed a tear at you waiting for the next post. 

1.  Arbonne makeup primer. Oh-Em-Gee. It makes your face feel super smooth and fills in those scary facial lines I don't have the guts to Botox out. Yet.  (Ordered from Arbonne, my best friend sells it. Link: https://www.arbonne.com/Pws/LaciMyers/ICE/repagreement.aspx?FlowType=ICE) 

 

2.  The SPF in this is legit. Husby took us to an Air Show last weekend and I slathered my face in it. Ironically I didn't get it right up to my hair line and I burned on the top 1/4" of my forehead. But everywhere else is golden tan.  (Walmart special right there). 

3.  Stila  Stay All Day foundation has changed my life! I have super oily skin and this is the right amount of coverage without feeling gross. Also if I need MORE coverage I have found I can do several layers if you will.....I feel like I'm blogging about icing. 😂 (Thank you to the sweet makeup guru at Ulta for helping me find my shade!)

 

4.  Maybelline Color Tattoo Metal 24 hr Eyeshadow lasts all. day. I have two colors and I can blend them into a custom shade and it glides on with my finger. Once I apply it the cream sets in a matter of seconds. It's awesome!  (Both purchased at the Walmarts)

 

5.  It's a long story but I had a full blown sew in weave earlier this year. My stylist recommended this spray for my 'hair'. I found it in the ethnic section of a beauty supply store and I don't know if you can get it at Walmart but Amazon sells it. This stuff works wonders! I have my own natural hair now and I still use it every day. Prepare yourself. Your hair won't move a bit when it sets. I use it daily in Bee's hair and it stands up to most crazy active school days. Best part? It washes out with one shampoo. Can I get an amen?

 

It's Memorial Day weekend! I'll be showing houses all weekend and trying not to melt in this god forsaken Oklahoma heat. What are your plans?

XOXO

Summer

Shrink Wrapped

GUYS! My life has been forever changed. I went through my closet this weekend and GOD BLESS my sweet Husby. He was quite a trooper helping me zip and squeeze into clothes my naive self thought still fit. I mean straight up stuffing sausage in a casing. I digress. I took every. single. piece. of clothing out my side of the shamelessly small space and loaded it on our bed. It was a mountain. Mt. Everest looked like a pea compared to it. I sorted til my little t rex arms couldn't take it anymore. And I had bigger piles than I started with. Sadly I chose to do this WITH my husband in the room so guess who 'doesn't need any more clothes' for a while? 🙄

I stared down the pile. It stared down me. (Is that grammatically correct?!)  Fast forward four hours later I discover these gems at Walmart! 

 

Guys. I crammed about everything I owned in TWO BAGS. IT WAS MAGICAL. Seal the bag.  Use the vacuum to suck out air. BOOM. 

 

Once I realized the capacity I had I dug deep in the hall closet for any and everything I could suck the air out of. 

 

Even Husby got involved! 

 

I only wish you had heard the squeals I made. Happy sucking my friends! 

What will you shrink wrap today?

xoxo Summer

Wordless Wednesday

#erincondrenplanner #LIFE  

New Pastures to Roam

I took a trip today.  This was such a different one than what I used to take when I was little. Mama took me to the doctor because my hurt spots were on fire and making me so sick. We laid down and she held me and I couldn't help but close my eyes and go to sleep. I could hear her crying in my ear and telling me to go to Jesus.  I tried so hard to stay awake.  But I was so tired and hurt so much.


Funniest thing, I heard a man's voice whisper in my ear-- it sounded like singing and I shot back up.  There were fields and creeks for miles.  Everything was so bright and beautiful.  Scooter was there! (He was my first friend!)  My long lost sister, Sheeba was her crazy self too! And my Granddaddy Great the cookie man! And sweet Grandmother who always pet my face and loved to watch me gallop through the woods in Stillwater.  When I got up I realized it didn't hurt to walk anymore. All my old lady hurt spots-- that's what Mama called them-- were gone!  I was shiny and clean and all my hair had grown back!  When grandmother reached down to pet me my side didn't tremor. I felt like a brand new puppy! What IS this place? 

Just when I didn't think it could get any better a gentle spirited man walked up to me.  Is this the Jesus man Mama always talked about?  He smiled and reached down to hug me.  I could feel my big long tail wag so hard it hit his back but I was so happy and he laughed.  "Where is Mama?  Where are my little people Rylie and Zacharia?  I'm so confused!"  Jesus rubbed my ears and I knew it was all going to be ok.  "Don't worry precious Caddy.  Mama's not here yet, her time will come.  You did your job...you watched over her during her hardest heart breaks, life changing moves, deaths and devastations.  You helped her celebrate life, births and love.  You've had a long, happy life.  YOU, Cadillac, are the most amazing dog.  And she misses you, but one day you will all roam the fields of this new place.  Don't you know Cadillac?  All dogs go to heaven?......"

Earthbound: April 18, 2006

Heavensent: April 22, 2017 

Eye Opener

Ever blink and your day is over?  Today went by so fast!  The fall weather likes to be all bipolar and not commit to a decent temperature. I sweated like a pig at a BBQ today. Also, I learned if you birth two babies in less than a year and teach toddlers how to do jumping jacks (4 years later) you WILL pee your pants. Not by choice. The struggle is real.

Sometimes I have trouble sleeping so I stumble around Pinterest and I came across this gem of a website. Then I dug deep and found her 'Open my eyes October' devotional and I love it. It has only been four days but already the Bible verses I have studied have been powerful and mind blowing. The genius part is they are only short verses- three or four lines- but they really seem to apply to my life right now. I hope y'all enjoy it as much as I do!!!!


What did you read today?
YAY Jesus!
-Summer

October brings new beginnings

Y'all. It's been so long since I've done his I almost forgot how. But I'm back. I miss my writing outlet and sharing funnies with the world! This past year has been quite a struggle. My marriage was on a scary slope of rocks, nose dives and he said she said throwing stars. Luckily Husby and I have had our 'come to Jesus meetings' respectively and I think we are going to be ok. We pray together, serve in our church together and have mandatory date nights every week. And it has changed our entire EVERYTHING.

Our two children started PreK this year so that has been a big adjustment. I'm teaching full time again  which I thought would be a blast but after being so successful in real estate I'm seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. I took a giant leap of faith with an AMAZING, prestigious and elite company which has launched my real estate career into overdrive! Teaching doesn't have that sparkle and happy feels like it used to. Now it's just screaming kids and 'is it three yet?' I hate coming home from school because then I deal with my OWN kids. I just want a happy balanced family. I'm so lucky real estate has given me that gift!  I can't wait to be able to do it full time.

Elmo is getting older. Fast. He is starting to show early stages of feline dementia. It's so sad. And gives me anxiety and panic. Life without him is nothing. I'm doing the best I can to keep him comfortable and happy. But he gets confused and scared  at night and just howls in the bathroom until I hold him. He forgets to eat and has lost his 'fluff'. And he drinks out of the shower. So strange. His sleeping  patterns are all off. But we will get through his.

My husband and I have really clung to the Lord to get us through these dark scary times. We are so lucky in how he has blessed us. We are finally able to crawl out of the rubble that was our crumbling battlegrounds of marriage and stand tall together.  We have God and each other and that's all we need.

That being said, I hope to start writing again. About everything. Jesus. Good food. Funny things. I hope you stick around to read them. I promise not to drop the ball as I did before I have more motivation now. And a sexy guy to help me get through life. :). It's super fun. I can't wait!

I love you all. Thank you for following me through my crazy blog journey!

Get ready for me to fall/craft/bake your bum off the next few days!
What's your fall favorite?
-Summer

Birthday Suit

Everyone around me is having babies and registering for their showers. TRUST ME, I'm far from jealous but the little kid in me wants to know why we can't, as grown ups register for our birthdays. Can I tell you, I have a LIST of ridiculous things I want but my poor hubby would pass out if I spent money on them. Wouldn't the world be a happier place if we could ask for and  receive exactly what we wanted?! Not elaborate things (Range Rover with pink leather and diamond rims....). LITTLE things. Here's my birthday 2015 list. Let me know if you think I'm insane....

1. Selfie stick. Are you kidding me? TWO please. 

2.  A CASE of sour patch kids. Sam's Club, yall. Time to be proactive. 

3. Three pairs of sunglasses. Three. I lose things. I break things. My own two children take better care of things than I do. I try. But I fail..... Better give me four...

4. Bacon anything. Bacon. Bacon flavored cookies. Bacon popcorn. A pig. I don't care. Just bacon. 

5.  Mary Kay waterproof eyeliner that comes in a pot. If I was ever on survivor I would totally bring that ish with me. It's thick and nothing gets rid of it. Think war paint. Or decent makeup for a sweaty mother of two kids, a hamster, three dogs and a bearded dragon and King Elmo. 

6.  Chap stick. I use that stuff so much it's like crack to me. I had a three hour procedure done at the dentist yesterday and I almost lost my shit bc my lips felt scratchy and numb and I couldn't 'moisturize'. 

7.  Benadryl. Sounds insane but hear me out. I'm like the Mexican version of my Big Fat Greek Wedding (windex).  Watch the movie if u have no idea what I'm saying. Benadryl cures everything. Insomnia. The sniffles. Headaches. And they're pink. Everyone wins. 

My birthday is October 25. Countdown starts now. Get shopping. :)

XOXO

Summer

Breakfast Casserole

One of my closest friends made this at our last Bible study meeting and I pretty much ate half the pan....

Since I'm die hard WW (Weight Watchers) these days I tried to 'skinny' it out. Here's what I did:

Oven: 375 degrees 

Ingredients: 

-big can buttermilk biscuits (I could not find light version....)

-6 egg WHITES

-2 whole eggs

-1 cup shredded cheddar cheese (I'm too spoiled to use fat free...)

- 1/3 c turkey sausage crumbles (Jummy Dean, next to bacon and sausage in deli area)

-3/4 c milk (skim)

1. Cut biscuits up into little pieces and put in a greased (cooking spray) 9X13 pan. 

2.  Combine milk and eggs into a bowl and pour mixture over biscuit pieces. 

3. Sprinkle turkey sausage and cheddar cheese on top. 

4.  Cover with foil and cook for 35-40 minutes. Remove foil, cook another ten minutes until center is firm and cheese is melted. 

I cannot begin to tell you how happy this makes my tummy. I counted out 8 points for 1/6th of this. OMG. Serve with fresh seasonal fruit. Or white peppered sausage gravy. Oh y'all. I need a moment. 

And all the people said amen,

XOXO Summer

Chicken for Dummies

My cousin texted me last week...."Is organic chocken broth supposed to taste like fish?"

I'm sorry.  What?  Ya'll, that's the weirdest thing she has EVER said to me, and we have had our fair share of conversations. 

First off, props to her for stepping up and consciously making healthy choices for her and her sweet family.  Second off, NO, please don't buy it again.  Seriously.

Eating organic isn't supposed to be weird...or painful.  It's supposed to make you feel good about what you put in your body.  If your babe is asking you why the chicken and dumplings taste like penguin a la mode from the zoo exhibit, re-evaluate your pantry.

I told her what I tell everybody.  I make my own chicken broth.  WHAT?  How long does that take?  Don't you have guts and stuff to mess with?  Don't you have to quarter the bird then truss it and blah blah NO.  Here are a few steps that will hopefully help you live your life a little saner and less....fishy.... ha!

1.  Buy a decent sized crock pot.  I use it to cook ALL OF MY CHICKEN.  Shredded chicken breast for enchiladas?  Pot it.  Chicken and noodles chicken?  Pot it.  Seriously.  It's easy.

        *I normally put 3-4 frozen chicken breasts in my crock pot with necessary spices and just a splash (like 1/3 cup) of a liquid....normally water...sometimes wine/water mix....It's whatever....The chicken cooks on low for 6-8 hrs.  You'll know it/s done because it will literally fall apart when you poke it with tongs.*

2.  Don't be afraid to get down and dirty.  If you buy a quality brand bird, you won't have a lot of GROSS slimy chicken...bits....to handle.  And  I have never, ever had to deal with the guts of a chicken like you do when you have a turkey.

3.  Do your homework.  Prep is key here.  If you are just making a chicken to get shredded meat to have on hand, simple spices will do.  Maybe a lemon, quartered and some salt and pepper.  A bay leaf?  

Chicken is a mild meat, it takes on whatever flavors you throw at it so don't be afraid to get creative.  Don't be scared.  Hell, if you have already served your family penguin grade chicken stew, you can't really get much further down the well of feasting failures-- LOVE YOU CUZ!  Seriously, spices will serve you well if you play around with them to get the right mix.

4.  Save your jars.  I always save my glass pasta sauce jars.  I have always been able to put them in the dishwasher and reuse them over and over again.  Or you can use Mason Jars.  It's whatever. 

You'll see why you need them in the end..

5.  Here's the down and dirty:
         a.  place your bird breast side down (only if it's a big chicken-- like it takes all your strength to wrangle the thing into your crockpot...think Monica and Chandler off of FRIENDS)

 

 or rump side down in your crock pot. 
      
       b.  Season with whatever you scrape out of the bowels of your spice cabinet. 
       c.  A little liquid.  Not much.  When the chicken cooks, it releases it's own juices which shall be said chicken stock.
       d.  Make sure it cooks for a good 6-8 hrs. on low.  I have a mighty powerful crockpot (THANK YOU Grandmother!  She knew what she was doing 8 years ago!!) so low is really like a med-low.  It cooks stuff fast.  
      e.  Remove chicken once it's cooked. 

OK, if you want the stock, PAY ATTENTION: 

• Put a big ol bowl in your sink.  Like huge. 
  
  
  
  

  
  
  Big enough for your colander (STRAINER, savvy?) to fit in. 
• Once you remove the chicken, it may fall apart...., pour out the rest of your juice and chicken 'parts' into the strainer and into the bowl.  Does that make sense? 
• You want to KEEP the juices from the crock pot but not the grosso bones.  So once you strain it, you will have a pretty decent amount of liquid in your bowl.  Toss or do whatever with your chicken bones and guts. 
• That chicken liquid is gold!  (Literally, it will shimmer...hahaha).  If you use a whole chicken, you should get a pretty good amount of liquid out of it.  I always add at LEAST 1 cup of water to it to dilute it.  Use your best judgement.  Then you just pour it into your saved glass jars and POOF.  You have organic chicken broth.  BOOM.  You're welcome. 
• Just don't pour all the liquid to the top of the jar....If you freeze them, you will need room for the liquid to expand. 

Friday Five (it's been too long ya'll!!)

Wow I thinks it's literally been a year since I've done a Fiver! Good gracious!

1.  

This stuff is amazing. And expensive. Luckily I found the originally $12 double pack for THREE dollars at Target (and my husband told me nothing there was cheap! Perhaps HE is cheap......) Anyways! It tastes like... Well... Chocolate. Kids love it. And it works! The cough syrup doesn't taste gross like robitussin. Can I get an amen?

2.  

NOT this can o crap. I bought it a while back because the kids were sick. I was hungry and rummaging through the pantry. Super gag nasty. And the pasta? You can't even tell what shapes they are?!? 

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT??

3.  

I need this in my life. I will never take it off. As will I never leave my yoga pants.  Elmo approves. He let me put it in his charge card. 

4.  It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Our newest Netflix obsession. Charlie is my FAVORITE person ever. Like he might even trump Chandler Bing. We shall see. 

5.

YALL. I sweat like the Mexican that I am. And this lovely spray hides it. Best part is that it dries super fast and I never EVER have deodorant marks on my clothes. (Which is near impossible not to do when you have t-Rex arms like I do...the struggle is real. Elmo can't even handle me getting dressed in the morning.)

I hope the weekend is kind to you. I have a bunch of real estate studying to do. Next week, per request, I will teach ya'll how to make super easy chicken stock and haddock. (But not together....awkward....)

TGIF

XOXO Summer

Flushing Nostalgia

     Whilst watching TV last night, a toddler diaper commercial struck a chord with me.  The narrator said something to the effect of "Looking back you wonder where your newborn baby has gone...." 

Still looking?  I have the answer!  The 'nostalgic' time you have spent with your precious darling has been flushed away with this afternoon's feeble attempts at potty training your 2 1/2 year old.  But it's not just memories and fly by the seam of his pants tinkle sprinkle...there's so SO so much more.....

Here's a list of things you may or may not temporarily misplace as your time on this earth continues to revolve around a child...or two.....whose only missions in life is for you to answer WHY and discover an unending bowl of candy...

1.Sick days consist of you retching your brains out in your bathroom with a shocked, scared, symphonic orchestra of toddlers howling at your every gag.  Once they realize you aren't dead, they make a great game called "Puke Mommy" and continue to re-enact your grand performance, yet five scales higher and 10 times grosser.  Oh, and now it's funny.  (Clearly you will find it funny in 10 years.  You will.  Never mind you now pee your pants every time you puke.  That can beyour (and your washing machine's) dirty secret.

2.  Taking a shower until the hot water runs out.  Or a bath.  Only water left after 4 loads of laundry, 2 runs of dish washer and two toddler bathing sessions is water good enough to pour into you dog's water bowl.  There's times I've contemplated outdoor bathing....then I think how our poor neighbors are already concinved I'm mentally unstable.  So I'll take my chances of stepping on soggy used wash cloths and SHARP edged plastic dinosaurs in the tub.  *sigh*

3.  Yoga pants were sanctioned strictly for YOGA.  Namaste.  Boom, you have 5 minutes to get out the door to drop you daughter off to preschool (and it's that kind of school where mom's evaluate you by what you drive, wear, and dress your precious girl in).  It's safe to say this little group of "Hollister Hoes" has judged me and now just take pity on my lack of shower, full set of gel nails, and Tory Burch house shoes.  In fact, I think they just accept me as the broken Barbie that I am.  Hell, last week one of the staff hesitated dropping Bee off to me after class because she didn't know I was her mom.  THIS HAPPENED.  Back to yoga pants.  They stretch.  They are comfy.  They match all of my t-shirts.  And I now LIVE in them.  Want me to grab an afternoon glass of pinor?  Sure, let me grab my Lycra.  Cause you know, I work out.  Or whatever.

4.  You can NOW tell the difference between toddler and dog pee.  It takes a special kind of mom (and kids..and pets....) to get into that club.  I've been in it for a while.

5.  Your super suped up "Game Day" football pride TV is permanently set to Disney Jr.  AND your 3 year old knows how to use the remote better than your own parents.  I'm serious.  Last year, Miss Bee ordered some premium hockey package for $200.  We were charged.  Had no idea.  Only when I convinced the DirecTV people we 'were Oklahoman and could give two shits about sticks and pucks' were we reimbursed.  Who knew?  Who knew you could sing then ENTIRE Mickey Mouse song on your own.  Or find Peppa Pig on Nick Jr with your eyes closed.  It's a gift, ya'll.

6.  Shaving your legs becomes your best weekly accomplishment.  Seriously.

7.  You are in line in the grocery store (kids are with Dad on an adventure of their own) and you keep humming a catchy tune in your head.  You're so good at it!  WHERE have you heard this song??? MY SWEET BABY JESUS.  It's the alphabet song.  And you all but whoooped and hollered it in the checkout line of Whole Foods.  Then I realize my cashier is a very tall, masculine built "Pauline" wearing purple makeup to match his-her-his? ensemble???!!!!  I wonder if he/she knows the alphabet song? I'll ask next time . I will keep me from asking the most asinine questions I want to speak but know I will melt in a pool of shame once asked.

8.  Your technology skills are all but flushed also.  Don't believe me?  Well, don't call me when your kid locks your phone and you know know how to answer it and you boss calls you three times.......

Obviously there are awesome things about being a parent, I'm a little too tired to recall them now..

Happy Flushing!
XOXO Summer

Jesus and Butter

Today we celebrated the life of my Grandaddy's last sister.  The end of an era. And it has made me realize something. The generation of jello mold salads and homemade pecan pie is slowly, sadly dwindling. And that's devastating. 

When my Granddaddy was alive everyone sat at the table Sunday afternoon and ate roast and carrots. And no cell phones existed. People had real conversation and real butter. And they prayed. 

Looking around at the amazing lunch provided for us by the sweet ladies at the same church that has raised my grandparents, survived multiple tornadoes, and given heartfelt services for so many families, it is an overwhelming emotion. 

No where else but a tiny town in Oklahoma will you find Jesus, potato casserole, and four homemade pecan pies in one setting  

What will we do when this entire generation goes to visit the Good Lord? Who will make the ambrosia jello salad? The Bible thumping lectures? Tell the amazing stories of rose gardens, eating your pet duck (because 'they were farm animals), and how back then people paid cash for their cars? And houses?

I can only imagine what people will say about me when I go. Will I live to be 97 like my grandparents? Will someone bring pie? Please make sure someone buries me with bacon. 

Amen yall. 

XOXO Summer